Three simple words: "Raise Good Humans". I will never forget the first time I saw the Mom Culture shirt with this phrase on it. It immediately resonated with me. Sounds so simple, but is it?
No matter our background or current circumstance, I think it’s fair to say all of us moms hope to do just that. I have played that phrase over and over in my head. I’ve envisioned what it looks like, what it feels like, and how it can be achieved.
Not only is it imperative that we strive each and every day to raise genuinely good human beings, but it's also the biggest challenge we will face. Becoming a mother is (without a doubt) the single most miraculous event to ever occur. Amidst the miracle, we are simultaneously facing some of life's biggest hurdles.
Our bodies are different, our emotions are all over the place, and we feel more depleted than we ever have before. We’ve strapped into the world’s largest roller coaster and the end is nowhere in sight.
I will be the first one to admit, I did not like the person I was the first few months after giving birth. I was an emotional wreck. Beyond moody, and did not treat my partner as well as I should have. I was overwhelmed, exhausted, and just unhappy with my appearance. I refused to cut myself any slack. Instead, I talked down to myself daily.
Instead of making positive changes in my daily life I used my energy to compare my situation with those around me. I critiqued my circumstance based on what I was seeing and caused my own suffering.
One day, while scrolling through Instagram, I came across Mom Culture. A friend of mine posted a photo wearing the shirt that said, Raise Good Humans. I can't explain why, but that phrase really struck a chord for me. I began reading posts where numerous moms shared their postpartum bodies and experiences. I felt an overwhelming sense of belonging.
These women were real, raw, and inspiring. Over the next week or so I continued to follow the posts and read the Mom Culture Blog. I still, had those three words glued to my brain.
It really hit me. I want nothing more in this world than to set my child up for success. I don’t want her merely surviving; I want her thriving. How can I ensure she does so? How can I instill the morals and values I hold dear, and how can I look back and know I raised a good human?
Simple, model it myself. Live it myself. Children are sponges. They absorb just about everything around them. What they see, hear, and feel all becomes a significant part of who they are.
It was time for me to stop becoming so negatively self-absorbed. It was time for me to embrace myself, my situations and current circumstance with love and gratitude. Instead of complaining about the things I did not like about myself I chose to take action and change them.
I made a list of goals I wanted to achieve. I wrote down ten things I love about myself and focused on that. I took hold of my health, started exercising regularly and went back to a plant-based diet. I decided to do little things each day that make me happy. It will always be a work in progress but I will stay persistent and consistent.
Ultimately, if you want to Raise Good Humans, you need to be one yourself. Love and embrace who you are and lead the happiest life you can. When our children look back they should remember how loving and happy we were. How we didn't let the little things get to us, and how much we loved and accepted them as well as ourselves.
Don’t be afraid to seek help, or reach out to those around you who can relate. Sometimes all we need is a shoulder to lean on and an ear to listen.
Stephany lives in SoCal and wife and full-time mama. Her blog focuses on motherhood and encourages other mamas to keep on truckin' even when times get tough. Follow her on Instagram and check out her blog. here.